........in this moment I choose to be still........
(kb: pauses to breathe, then smiles)
I choose to be here now
August 10, 2010
Falling in Self Love: Day 44
Scared, Distracted, Present
Yesterday I experienced a whirlwind of emotion. It felt like a ping pong match: old stuff vs new stuff. Closure & new beginnings with a dash of that which has yet to be completed. No wonder I woke up "off" (the kinda tired sleep can't cure) this morning. Then all of a sudden I started missing my brother, his tough love & support. His elegance & tenacity. There I was, feeling scared to let go of yesterday. Scared of what today would bring. Scared to leap into tomorrow.
........in this moment I choose to be still........
(kb: pauses to breathe, then smiles)
........in this moment I choose to be still........
(kb: pauses to breathe, then smiles)
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UPDATE:
Today I have a big day of choices. I'm at a crossroads in two significant areas in my life. My brother was good at making tough choices. He was a bull...and graceful. His words weren't always gentle but they were filled with love and encouragement. Today I feel scared...to feel good. I feel sad to say that but in THIS moment, it is true. I am realizing, in order for me to have what I want I must let go of some old uncomfortably familiar) things.
You know what I just realized? I too am a risk taker. I have always been. He seemed to be fearless, maybe he felt fear but leaped anyway??? Just like I do. Perhaps today, I called him in BECAUSE I feel scared and BECAUSE I wanted a voice whispering "you can do this karen, ready? 1..2..3...jump!"
This makes me smile, cry & laugh!
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